Samvedna

"Door kahi..koi rota hai... tan par pahra...bhatak raha man...sathi hai keval soonapan...
bichhad gaya kya....swajan kisi ka.....krandan sada...karun hota hai....


Janam divas par...hum ithalate....kyun na maran tyohar manate...
Antim yatra ke avasar par...aansu ka ashakun hota hai".... (From album 'Samvedna')


When Atalji penned this poem during the emergency..(as described by him in the prelude)...in all probability...he wouldn't have imagined that his deep thoughts will be composed so beautifully..so aesthetically...yet so simply..! Jagjit Singh composed the music and sang it such that....these simple words just got dissolved in the veins...permeated right through...!! - Don't know if I am able to express myself here properly...
What use of Violin, Strings and Flute...subtle and beautiful...contributing in bringing out the right emotions... A sense of peace...melancholy...a sense of loss....everything..!!


"Ek baras beet gaya.... Ek baras beet gaya.....
Jhulsata jeth maas...sharad chandni udaas....
siski bharte saavan ka....antar ghat reet gaya...


Path niharte nayan....ginte din palchhin..
laut kabhi ayega...man ka jo meet gaya..."


Beautiful words by Atalji...( His style of saying 'siski bharte savan ka antar ghat reet gaya' ..is just awesome! :-) I still remember his election rally some 15 odd years back..when he came to Jabalpur...never have seen any better orator than him!) and Jagjit sang in a very slow tempo...and in low scale...as if the world has stopped and you have all the time to watch it..feel it...feel the 'jhulsata jeth maas', the brutal Indian Sun of May-June...feel the 'sharad chandni'....the winter sky filled with stars..!


Most of the poems of the album Samvedna, are in slow tempo...are of philosophical demeanor...but the music grows on you. Every song starts with a small commentary by Atalji where he either gives a little background of time when he wrote that poem or he utters the first 2 lines of his poem in his unparalleled & relaxed style. These songs remind me of my initial days in UK's chilling winters...some memories to remember!

Passion Vs Profession

They show this bollywood movie '3 idiots' many a times on TV... watched it yet again. I won't talk about the movie as such, but about the idea the movie tried to communicate. One of the idiots, Farhaan (Played by Madhavan), says to his father.. 'Rancho bahut simple si baat kahta hai daddy, us cheej ko apna profession banao, wo kaam karo...jisme tumhe maza ata hai, man lagta hai...fir kaam kaam nahi lagega...khel lagega!' This idea has been of many...that there is nothing better in this world than having your passion as your profession! You never feel tired or bored pursuing your passion...there is no chance you would complain about lack of job satisfaction when your passion is your job!

But easier said than done...there are many questions in my mind....can we really do that...can we really leave everything aside and pursue our passion? I often wonder how many of us do have a real passion for something? They say it's never too late to go for your passion...but is it really true?  

First of all, how can we define passion...and how can I identify what my passion is? Does passion derive from hobby? Don't know.....let me explore hobby and passion out here...!

In layman's terms, I would think a hobby is something, which I like doing the most. Something I can do all the time, 24 hours a day, and 7 days a week..yet can't get enough of it..can't get bored of it. Something I enjoy doing the most...Something that always makes me curious...Something I want to know more about..

I think a hobby would become a passion when you start feeling that this is your life....this is what you are born for. This is what you want to be known for (..if at all you bother about what others think of you!). You can live without your hobby...but I wonder if same can be said about your passion..! - Probably that's the difference between 'just a hobby' and 'passion'!  But come on....who thinks or talks like that...? All this 'funda'...and language is used by Philosophers, spiritual guru kind of people...isn't it??

Let me think what my hobbies are...which I would love to call as my passion (or are those already my passions?),  well, it took 30 years, to realize that there are two things in this world that give me immense joy & satisfaction...that fulfill my sense of creativity...that make me at peace with myself and also with the world....and those are: Music (to be specific - it's Singing...to be more specific - it's singing Gazals!) and Writing. Nothing gives me immense joy and peace other than singing a Gazal of maestro's like Jagjit Singh, Ghulam Ali or Hariharan, Talat mahmood, or Mohammad Rafi. Same joy and peace flows in and out of me, when I am able to write down my thoughts..when I am able to express my views & feelings in written words!

But what is my profession right now? For the past 8 years I have been known as IT professional, and have enjoyed the life as such without many complaints...going to onsite trips.. roaming around the world, having a salary which can't be termed hefty, but enough to lead a comfortable life...let me frame it as 'upper middle class' life in a metro city. Am I used to all this ease & comfort now? If I were to go for my passion now, lets say music, then I can see what lies ahead  - Some real hard-work in terms of learning the nuances of formal classical music and then the struggle in the music industry to carve out a career..I'll loose this consistent supply of a monthly salary I am so used to of! No surety that I will be able to establish myself as a successful singer or composer...there are millions who come to Mumbai to try their luck!

So going for the passion seems to be like taking a plunge into unknown...into uncertainty...! 

I am sure everyone of us has thought about living their passion at some stage in their life...but only some have the will and strength to go for it.


May God give that strength to the rest of us! - Wishing everybody a Happy Diwali!!

Tribute to Jagjit Singh

Jagjit Singh ji is no more....a loss to Gazal gayaki and sensible music. As it happens with me always....I didn't realize what does this loss mean to me? Though I got the news and said to myself and friends it's sad etc etc...but as such I was unaffected...I was busy with my normal daily routine..going to office...coming back and so on...suddenly one day while on-route to office in the bus, when I switched on my iPod and selected a song from 'Samvedana', an album by Jagjit where he composed for Atal Bihari Vajpayee's poems, it struck me that this person is no more in this world..whom I am listening to right now..! I am not going to see him again...! (it's not as if he was my neighborhood friend and I used to see him daily..but still) I used to attend his concerts in Mumbai, as & when I got a chance...and although off-late I used to get a bit disappointed with his singing in concerts as he used to experiment too much...but yet his uniquely deep & sensitive voice always used to enthrall & amaze. Often I have craved for his earlier concert singing...especially when I listen to some old concert recordings...like 'Duniya jise kahte hain' , 'Fir usi rah guzar par Shayad', 'Shola hoon bhadakne ki guzarish nahi karta' etc. I often wished I was there to attend his concerts when he was at his prime!


For me, he along with Ghulam Ali has been a great influence....I grew up in a family where hindustani classical music was the most played music(till we arrived on the scene! :-) ) my father & grandfather both knew playing Tabla & Sitar respectively. But we children.. were hardly impressed by classical music and looked at it as boring stuff. :-) Though now I appreciate classical music much more.


I remember listening to Ghulam Ali first time when I was a child and my father would often play his cassettes. Then later on I was introduced to Jagjit Singh by my elder brother when he entered his engineering 1st year. That was the time when a musical program called Saregama had also started on TV with Sonu Nigam as an anchor. For me, this program really generated an interest in the old Hindi Film music and other non-film music genres such as folk & gazals and even classical music...otherwise till then, for me music meant the then trendy hindi film music with numbers like...'tu cheez badi hai mast mast'  :-).  So from there on, I got attracted to Jagjit's deep voice with his unique small vibrations (harkatein). Jagjit and his wife Chitra  made a really great singing pair...their contrasting natures of voice (While Jagjit's voice is deep & at lower octave..kind of outside-in, Chitra's is at higher octave...inside-out) seemed to complement each other's singing.


I have associated different phases of my life with one or the other Gazals of these two maestros. So whenever I recall past..the associated gazal comes first in mind! - That's the kind of attachment has been with Jagjit Ji & his gayaki, for me. But I often think that.....that's the beauty of these legends...they have left a legacy..they have given the world which will remain there even after them...even after they have passed away...the music..the compositions created by Jagjit will always be there with me...with other fans!


To conclude with one of his composition.. this is what he means to me - 'Jate jate wo mujhe achhi nishani de gaya.....Umr bhar doharaunga..aisi kahani de gaya.'

Power of Compounding

I came across this article about ‘Power of compounding’ in DNA money, Oct 5^th 2011 DNA newpaper’s financial and economic news section. I found it very interesting and thought you too would like it and may benefit from it, so reproducing the whole article here:

Power of Compounding:

“In the book, ‘Once upon a Wall Street’, Peter Lynch, one of the most successful mutual fund managers that wall street has ever seen, narrates a story.

Consider the Indians of Manhattan, Who in 1625 sold all their real estate to a group of immigrants for $24 in trinkets and beads. For 363 years the Indians have been the subjects of cruel jokes because of it- but it turns out that they may have made a better deal than the buyers who got the island. At 8% interest on $24 (note: let’s suspend our disbelief and assume they converted the trinkets to cash) compounded over all those years, the Indians would have built up a net worth just short $30 trillion, while the latest tax records from the Borough of Manhattan show the real estate to be worth only $28.1 billion.

Give Manhattan the benefit of doubt: That $28.1 billion is the assessed value, and for all anybody knows, it may be worth twice that on the open market. So Manhattan’s worth $56.2 billion. Either way, the Indians could be ahead by $29 trillion and change!

This little story conveys you the power of compounding and the fact that the earlier you start investing the better it gets.

Illustration

Let’s try and understand this through an example of two friends Ram and Shyam. Both start working at the same time at the age of 23. Ram starts saving when he turns 25 and invests Rs. 50,000 every year. Assuming that on this he earns a return of 10% every year, at the end of ten years, Ram has been able to accumulate Rs. 8.77 lakh.

However, due to financial constraints Ram is not able to invest any more money after the 10^th year. At the same time he does not utilise the fund that he has already accumulated, hoping to live off it when he retires.

He lets the Rs. 8.77 lakh grow and assuming that it continues to earn a return of 10% p.a., he would be able to accumulate around Rs. 95 lakh by the time he turns 60. So the Rs. 5 lakh (Rs. 50,000 x 10 years) he had invested in the first ten years of his working life would have grown to Rs. 95 lakh. This, even though he stopped investing entirely after the first ten years.

Now let’s take the case of Shyam. Shyam believed in enjoying life, spending money recklessly rather than save regularly.

However at the age of 35, reality suddenly dawns upon him and he starts putting aside Rs. 50,000 every year. Unlike his friend Ram, who stopped after the first 10 years, Shyam religiously invests the amount each year for all of 25 years i.e. till he turns 60. Now, assuming he also earns a return of 10% per year on his investments, in the end, Shyam would have managed to 

accumulate Rs. 54.10 lakh.

Putting it differently, even after investing Rs. 50,000 regularly for 25 years, Shyam has only managed to accumulate Rs. 41 lakh lesser in comparison to Ram. Remember Ram has ended up investing only Rs. 5 lakh in total over the 10 years that he invested. In comparison, Shyam over the 25 years invested Rs. 12.5 lakh (Rs. 50,000 x 25 years). So even by saving two-and-a-half times more that Ram, Shyam has managed to build a corpus which is 43% lower! This happened because Ram started investing earlier which in turn allowed the money to compound for a greater 

period of time.

Also, as the corpus grows, the impact of compounding is greater. Ram as we know had managed to accumulate Rs. 8.77 lakh after 10 years after which he stopped investing, allowing the accumulated corpus to compound for 20 years more. In other words, the total life of the investment was for 30 years. However had his investment time-frame been till he turned 55 i.e. had the money compounded for 25 years instead of 30, then at the end Ram would have accumulated a corpus of around Rs. 59 lakh. By choosing to let his investment run for just an additional five years, Ram managed to accumulate Rs. 45 lakh more.

Real life illustration

In terms of a practical example, let’s take the case of HDFC Equity fund. The 5 year return of this fund is around 13% p.a. On the other hand from inception (December 1994), the fund has returned 21% p.a. Now, had an investor invested say Rs. 50,000 five years back, the investment would have grown to around Rs. 91,000.

However had the investment been made at the inception (allowing the money to compound over a greater period of time) the investment would have grown over 24 times to around Rs. 12 lakh.

To sum up, Albert Einstein himself called the power of compounding the 8^th wonder of the world. In this article we have given various examples of how potent this power is when combined with its ally—Father time. It’s never too early nor too late to begin investing. Or to put it differently, better late than later.”

After reading this, I can see where I am, my situation being pretty much similar to ‘Shyam’ of the example! But since now I know about the power of compounding, and as they say better late than later, I intend to chalk out my own financial planning. Hope this article will make us think about investments and financial planning a bit more seriously, especially for the new ones who have recently come out of their colleges & have started earning!

Concert update

It was to be a concert bringing the two greats...two maestros of 'Gazal' (Gazal can be termed as a light classical indian musical genre...wherein poems written in Urdu language are sung expressively) together...Jagjit Singh and Ghulam Ali..for the first time! I have followed these two greats since my childhood...thanks to my father who was a fan of Ghulam Ali and my elder brother who became a fan of Jagjit during his college days..! I was looking forward to see them singing together.. interacting together..but something unfortunate happened. :(

I was on my way to the concert..when I got a sms from organizers that Jagjit Singh would not be able to perform due to health reasons and instead..Hariharan is going to join Ghulam Ali. I was a bit disappointed ..though Hariharan is a wonderful singer...but expectations were already set to see the two Gazal maestros together whom I have admired for years. I sincerely pray to God for his quick recovery...a great singer who made Gazals accessible and popular among masses...Jagjit Singh ji...you have been an idol for me!

Hariharan started with some of his popular gazals like ‘kash aisa koi manzar hota’.. ‘mai khayal hoon kisi aur ka’ , 'mareez-a-ishq ka kya hai’, ‘patta patta buta buta’….all with some wonderful improvisations and he created some breakthrough moments when you automatically start clapping and sighing ‘wah wah’….but with due respect to him…somehow that ‘rooh’ was missing…

Nevertheless he was simply superb when he sang what he calls ‘urdu blues’, a gazal from album kash ‘ye aaine se akele me’…. because according to him when he was composing this track the notes resembled a lot with ‘blues’…a western musical genre. I have been to few other fusion concerts..but none of them generated much interest..all sounded like an stretched & forced alliance of eastern & western forms! But here…it was a wonderful seamless fusion of western and eastern music..I just wondered how effortlessly Hariharan was playing with notes as he wished and all that play was making people wanting more & more! 

Then came the maestro himself…Ghulam Ali…but he was a pale shadow of his own brilliant past…age seems to have affected his voice…he had to put a lot of effort in singing….still he pulled it off quite nicely..through his unparallel earthy eloquence…there is a lot to learn from him in the art of engaging the audience in a performance…his style of singing  some brilliant ‘sher’s..2 liners, explaining meaning of difficult urdu words…polite manners…quoting some old interesting stories about his musical journey..cracking jokes…all was quite charming.  He was absolutely brilliant and sometimes unbelievable on Harmonium….he didn’t need another Harmonium player..he played all by himself….and it would have been just perfect if his singing was also like the old days…. I was able to understand his ideas..& what he wanted to sing but couldn’t. I was thinking oh God...if only I was born few years earlier so that I could have attended his concerts when he was at his prime...! :-)

The concert ended with a jugalbandi, Hariharan giving company to Ghulam Ali for ‘Barasan lagi’ a dadra in raag piloo (a semi classical form) …quite melodious…was good to watch audience humming the ‘dhun’ of a semi classical stuff which was not that famous either.

Overall a good concert...but one who has listened to Ghulam Ali’s old concert recordings…he’ll be disappointed…badly missing that voice and style.

Learnings...

Just thought to write down the learnings from my life so far... will try to keep adding new learnings on a daily/weekly basis...

16th July 2011:

- There are indeed some basic principles that govern the life on earth...there is definitely a 'right way' to live....and if we don't live in accordance with those principles...we find ourselves in pain, agony and sorrow. Those who lead a life in sync/ in tune with these principles, are happy forever...always filled with eternal bliss.

For example some principles are:

Honesty, Integrity, Quality, Fairness, Growth, Service etc...things that define Humanity..things that differentiate Humans from the instinct driven animals.

- The material wealth...and sensory pleasures do give us happiness...joy...and even peace sometimes...but that's not long lasting...that's transient...temporary. And the trouble is the sorrow it gives...which is long lasting...even permanent in some cases!

But the long lasting bliss...peace and happiness can be found only within...only through meditating onto our true-self...which is not just the body....we are soul...we are GOD.

Hence we must know what we should be after..in our lives...temporary or permanent?

- I do believe in Hindu spirituality's following concepts: God has given a 'free will' to human beings...and a man can find true happiness when his will is in accordance with God's will... when this free will is in sync with God's will. One must understand or must try to remind oneself...that this whole world is an illusion...and we are nothing...it's not I who is taking decisions..who is running this world....but it's the almighty! There is no 'I'... the 'Ego' is an illusion..so just get rid of this ego...and start seeing God in everything and everyone in this world.

- Man's true nature is 'Divinity' and not animality...God has given a unique quality to Humans..that makes them different from animals... discrimination & conscience...i.e. their ability to differentiate between right and wrong...truth and lie....good and evil. Every Man deep in heart knows what he's doing...and whether it's right thing to do or not. So keep a basic faith or trust in people while dealing with them in our daily lives....and refrain from the instinct driven acts.

- Instinct driven acts can give some temporary joy but eventually it erodes self-esteem and character, causes guilt and suffering. Actions based on principles...rather than the instincts...will build our character...and will lead us to happiness and satisfaction within.

- I do believe in Karma theory...'Your present is the result of your actions of the past.' And hence, if we extend the theory a bit, today's actions will make tomorrow...so in a way 'Our future is in our own hands'. So plan for the future, list down your priorities, and start working NOW...stop 'just thinking', and start acting on that thinking.

- Past is past...you can't go back in time and change it. So accept your past as a fact of your life...and remember, that your past doesn't define you. You are much more than what you have been in past...You are DIVINE. Similarly Future is non-existent..only thing that exists....the only truth is 'Present'...this very moment of time...this is what exists...Past and future don't. Hence what matters is the present...and what are we doing in the present...and only that defines us.

- Learn from past....understand what mistakes you made...and remember not to repeat the same mistakes again. The Past should be used to become wiser and stronger.

- When ever you are feeling like going for one of the many choices you have......don't commit...take a day more to think about it and then go for it. At the outset, things might look simple and straight forward, but it can get complex and tricky....so always seek more time before committing finally. Once committed...give your full effort into the commitment.

- Difficulties/Failures always teach something...and we come out stronger...and remember only those fail, who have tried....so keep trying. Sometimes, your faith is tested by God..by life...by nature....so don't loose hopes soon...keep trying your best....it's only going to make you stronger and better than before.

- There are always 2 options to choose when we come across a problem in our life - Either to face the challenge and try to find the solution...or else try to avoid it...blame others...find faults in others...blame your fate..blame God...ask God why he made me so weak..why it's always me..etc..etc. The choice is ours...and so are the results.

- Whatever the failure is...and whatever the reasons are...and whoever apart from you was responsible for that..... it's always in our best interests..if we concentrate upon our own shortcomings...if we ask ourselves...that what I could have done better to avoid this failure? Finding faults in others is always easy.

- Whatever you are today in your life...you and only you are responsible for that.... understand this and take full responsibility of your own life. Don't blame anybody else at all for your failures...and give all the credit to GOD for your success. This will make you humble...and will open the gates for further success.

Mumbai...city of slums

Mumbai....some place..! I think I have a love-hate relationship with this city....financial capital...city of dreams...city of stars...at the same time...it's also a city of slums...abject poverty.

Today I was headed to the 'Mumbai property exhibition' held in the western suburban area- Bandra... this is supposed to be one of my serious initiatives in the direction of owning a house in Mumbai...if not to live myself...then may be as an investment...

As usual... I took a local train from Borivali and got down at Bandra this Sunday afternoon....but as I looked for exit at Bandra east platform, I found that due to some walker's bridge work.. I would have to take an exit route via the slums situated near the railway lines....my goodness... the sight of those clumsy slums was heart wrenching..... so called small huts or shanties...nothing but structures made of few wooden/steel bars and some large cloth covering it from top & sides....but I think probably there was a fire accident which burned down number of huts and these structures must be temporary ones....because I have seen slums in much better conditions...

Little children inside..some sleeping...some playing....ladies busy washing utensils..near sewage water...there is dirt and shit all over the place...it was like a scrapyard....so terrible conditions to live....looked like a refugee camp out there.....'how can human beings live in such conditions...that too not for few days or months...but for the whole life?' I thought, but then I was not watching this for the first time in my life...many a times I have seen slums and poverty in this city of dreams...! But I don't know why...today I was feeling ashamed of myself....I was thinking that I am so god damn lucky to be born in a well-to-do family....Suddenly I felt that God has given me everything....I grew up in a loving family....got well educated...got a decent job...got opportunities to see the world... yet I crib.....about high rents...unaffordable housing prices... and here millions are living out their whole lives literally in a toilet! Yet I have misused whatever God gave me.....I take all this comfort for granted...!

Another thought came in ..why there is so much poverty...and why such a huge divide between rich & poor? Why some people have to live like this....and some roam in air conditioned cars....just recently I read in the newspaper that these days lots of Indians are going for high-end luxury cars generally priced around Rs. 1 crore going even upto 20 crores! Such difference...Such gap...?

I don't know the reason .....there can be many....historic...karmic....economic...

Can't everyone get at least good and honourable living conditions....? What it would take to achieve that?

I don't know the solution either....

hmmm...Forget about it man....just sporadic thoughts...as usual...and no action....you are soon going to forget all about it and carry on your selfish living...so don't try to be a sympathetic hero of only words and no deeds...you moron!

Simply Simple!

Simple people...with a smile on their face...so talented...so learned...yet so down to earth...humble..such was the experience tonight...when we went for a concert..Hindustani classical..and got to meet such simple people. An eighty year old veteran...performed with the energy of a youngster..the sight of the audience in such small numbers...didn't make him discontent...he carried on..so engrossed into his music...it was like filling the empty canavas with vibrant colours...with beautiful imagination...and the mood..or rasa of the raga was totally extracted and sprinkled all over the audience...!!

All the artists...the percussionist, tanpura wadak, harmonium player... looked so happy while performing...truly enjoying their music....

I straight away felt like....I want to live my life like this.....I want to be there on stage...I want to be with them...learn this art from such great gurus....live out my passion and be happy like them...why can't I be happy chasing my dream?

I think...never in my life till now....I have done something with full devotion..determination....I have not given my everything to one goal.... but now I feel...that this is the goal....this is my destiny....

I don't know if I will succeed or fail......moreover....that also depends on what do I consider as success..! But if I can remain true to my own heart.....and carry on...on my chosen path with complete faith in my decision....that no matter what may come ahead....ups & downs..good times bad times...if I can carry on & on & on....then the journey itself will be fulfilling and satisfying...and ever blissful....and I think this is what the success is for me......the material benefits..money...fame...power..etc..are not at all the benchmarks of success...definitely not for me!

Run Forrest Run!!

'Mama always said, Life is like a box of chocolates Forrest, you never know what you are gonna get!'

Forrest Gump.....when I first time watched the movie...since I am a music buff...grew a liking to the background score of this movie quickly....the music adds on to the appeal and the emotional quotient of the movie.

"I don't know if we each have a destiny, or if we're all just floating around accidental-like on a breeze, but I, I think maybe it's both. Maybe both is happening at the same time."

When Tom Hanks said these dialogues....Forrest's whole life story started moving in front of my eyes...& then when I started looking at my life so far.....I thought, yeah....may be it's both...Forrest is so god damn rite! And that's why the life itself is so interesting....full of surprises...full of everything.... oh god....thanks for granting me a human life....

I don't know when the life will end...but I think one should live his/her life by following anything else but his/her heart....just like Forrest did....because heart never lies.

Life recorded...

"Bhooli bisri...chand ummeedein.... chand fasaane yaad aaye......Tum yaad aaye...aur tumhare..saath zamaane yaad aaye"....... from the Great Mehdi Hassan saheb... takes you to a relaxed and cultured environment...so alien to today's fast paced and self-centred world.....

I bought this cassette in Mumbai when I had recently started working after my graduation....it had all old classics from Mehdi Hassan....and straight away I started liking his pure way of singing...and as usual...I associated these gazals with my time in Mumbai...with sharing the flat in Borivali with my wonderful roommates....and with some really good time spent with them roaming around in Mumbai...!!!

So everytime I listen to this gazal in particular...all those memories come alive....that's my way of memorising my life story....ever since I started appreciating music...ever since I realized that I can't live without music....I started tagging my life with music...I identify various stages of my life with specific songs/gazals. Each song recalls the memories from the past...and brings joy/sorrow...all resulting in a drop or two of tears in my eyes...hehehe...I have heard that tears are good for eyes...improves farsight..!!

I think...I can not survive in this world...it's too harsh...and there is no margin for error...there is no place for somebody who doesn't understand 'duniyadaari'. Well....goddamn...who cares abt that...I am not going to change for the sake of surviving.....jab tak jiyo...dil se jiyo..majboori me nahi..!!

Mera saya

'Tu jahan jahan chalega...mera saya sath hoga'.... did I ever write about Lataji? She is absolute bliss....her voice...with all the emotions of the world...my god....it brings tears to the eyes...listening to her songs...!!

What a voice...and what control...just perfect..isn't it? I really love to listen to her old hindi film songs...specially 60's & 70's ....when she worked with SD burman, RD burman, MadanMohan etc..

I think no one can match her when it comes to bringing out the mood and emotions of a song..theme..or a raga....and that's what makes her different...and far ahead of all other singers..!

I always wanted to sing...but alas....these days I don't feel like I can be any good in any field...the confidence is just not there....but music is the only thing where I feel at home...at peace...at my own self...hmm....now that's beer talking...!

bye bye 39 fountain street

I miss 39 fountain street.....Gautam was the last person to leave...and we no longer will see this house no more..!! Me, Gautam and Soumen 'the jhaal' had some really good time here...and I miss all that even now! We had some great parties in this house with other pals...and also out in Leeds between 3 of us..together....and don't talk about the everyday hihi-hahas...we used to have.... pulling each others leg & all. Boy....when Soumen used to take command of the kitchen...my goodness...'dhoom macha deta tha launda'...he was our speciality chef...thai specialist..hehe! Aur ye log meri arabi ki sabji...ya patta gobhi aloo nahi bhulenge...3 hrs me jo banti thi....with 'in background' Jagjit singh hardcore on offer...hehe! Bytheway...Gautam was the best cook..his biryaani..his baingan bharta were awesome...and after few drinks his college time stories...boy he's got all the stories at his fingertips...and ask him anything abt any goddamn bollywood movie...he knows in & out..!! It was really a nice time of our lives we spent together... I think aise yaar bahut kam milte hain life me....aur inke saath naata zindagi bhar ka naata hona chahiye....ye nahi ki saath choot gaya to dosti bhi..!! I'll try to be true to my word!! Amen...!!

Humility- endangered species

Khuda humko aisi khudai na de...ki apne siva kuch dikhai na de.....! Indeed if I would believe in God and if at all I would want something from God...then I would ask for that..! Humility...I consider it the greatest of all the virtues of the world. I would never want to be blinded by whatever I have got...by whatever so called qualities I think I have...but I think in today's world humility is considered as a negative trait rather than a quality...those self praising so called music directors and singers who judge these mindless musical competition tv shows....are the typical examples of that. I don't think these guys have any right to be a judge to a music competition...and to pass comments on the legendry singers and music directors of yesteryears...but they do that frequently...they are famous...and they are rich...success means only fame and money these days...so they are successful!!

Mehndi Hassan- A phenomenon of its own kind

I didn't know about Mehndi Hassan much....must have heard his name somewhere in the musical circle..nothing more than that. Well...I already had Ghulam Ali thanks to my father....and then I had Jagjit Singh and Hariharan....thanks to my elder brother..so already 3 gazal maestroes..I was familier with..and I admired all the 3....so there was no place for a 4th one..!!

But after college...during my initial days of Job in Trivandrum..sourthern part of India...a cassette happened to catch my eyes in a music shoppe...Ghulam Ali & Mehndi Hassan - First time together! I thought why not try this...lets explore who's this guy called Mehndi Hassan.

So that was my first introduction to Mehndi Hassan...and it was a wonderful experience...his voice had a unique calmness..and softness...totally opposite of Ghulam Ali's restless one!

I really took a liking to his beautiful number ' Mai khayal Hoon kisi aur ka'....a complicated and serious gazal 'Ab ke hum bichhde' in a rare raga Bhoopkali...and some Rajasthani Folk as well...and then I bought some more of his stuff...and it was really good.

His style is very relaxed and he takes his time to expand and express the meaning of gazal woven into a raga...displays all the intricacies of the raga. He normally composes the gazals in a single raga...not mixing 2 ragas..tries to maintain the purity of the raga. The calming and soothing effect is awesome...and there are no parallels to it.

World of Finance

My cousin doing his MBA today met me online, he was writing some paper which he had to submit today on the subject 'World of finance'. He wanted me also to have a look and comment. So while going through it, I thought why not try this subject today for my blog...hehehe...!

World of Finance: It’s very boring....I hate financial jargon...like investments, shares, liquidity, interest rate, CRR, etc etc....I can relate to finance only to the extent to which any other common man could relate – Managing one’s money in such a way that one can run his/her family. Now I know that ‘running a family’ is a broader term, and for different people it can mean differently, the scale can be different – for a poor farmer, it might mean being able to cater for only the food, shelter and cloths for his family, whereas for a rich man, it would be being able to live a king size life. Still, more than that, I wouldn’t know about finance. But probably that might be the root...where this finance starts....people want to feed their family, they want them to wear good cloths, they want to live in a good accommodation, basically everyone wants a better quality of life...everyone wants to improve... so there is always a need...humans always need something...they are rarely content with whatever they’ve got...that might be the starting point of finance...may be.

Now the important question...am I good at it...am I good at managing my money? I am not... but what to do...mostly I spend money when I feel like spending...ofcourse my middle class upbringing makes me think about it once or twice but it fails to stop me though...investment, future planning...these things cross my mind but yet can't stop me spending when I want to.

But probably it'll all going to change soon..! I guess everyone must give some thought about investment and making one's wealth grow..it's hight time I should start the same.

That's world of finance for me...so mean so self centered isnt it?

Schindler's List

"It's Hebrew from the Talmud that says, 'whoever saves one life...saves the world entire..!" says Itzhak stern...Oscar Schindler's Jew accountant...while presenting him a golden ring forged using the golden tooth of his factory's worker...and Schindler breaks down....and says 'I could have got more out...if I had more money...I threw away lot of money...you have no idea..!' Itzhak says..."there are 1100 people all alive here..because of you...and there will be generations because of what you did..!"
That's one of the most touching scenes of 'Schindler's list'....wonderful performances...by both Liam Neeson as Oskar Schindler and Ben Kingsley (Remember 'Gandhi' ? - every middle class Indian must have seen many times on DD-1 every 2nd of Oct - Gandhi's Birth anniversary!) as Itzhak.

The Holocaust was one of the very unfortunate and shameful event in the history of human race...and it's so difficult to digest the fact that around 6 million Jews were killed in Europe just because one fanatic Tyrant...'Hitler' hated them and thought them as an impure race! And it was not just killing...but it was systematic mass murder..they chalked out plans to kill.....executed them...created reports..everything from macro to micro...was planned by the German Officials...it was all official! Whole of the government machinery was put to work for this...scientists and doctors were deployed to experiment and invent faster and lethal ways to kill Jews in bulk! The school curricula were prepared to preach antisemitism & hatred against Jews!

I had only heard of gas chambers and concentration camps...but in the movie I saw all of that..and it all looked so real...specially since the movie is all in black & white..it felt as if I am too wandering in Europe of that time..! And since I have got an ear for music.....the background score moved me a lot....it brings out all the pain and sufferings of the victims of the Holocaust....and you can feel that. I often think..that people who had to suffer all of this..,.what was their fault...only this...that they were born Jews...and they were born during Hitler's time??

Isn't that incredible, that Today there are more than 7,000 descendants of the Schindler-Jews living in US and Europe, many in Israel. Before the World War II, the Jewish population of Poland was around 3.5 million. Today there are between 3,000 and 4,000 left.

Hats off to Oskar Schindler....and hats off to Spielberg for making him known to us.

Zindagi me ek lakshya hona chahiye...lakhsya ke bina zindagi ke koi mayne nahi hain..! Imagine you are just wandering in the world with no specific reason or motif. I am going through the same patch in my life right now....I dont know what's my lakshya....and whatever I am doing...I dont know why am I doing....that's really strange..and scarry. I dont even know why am I writing this blog today....but then I think why in the world everything should have some reason...

Someone Somewhere

Aadmi aadmi ko kya dega...
Jo bhi dega...wahi khuda dega..


Gazal from the album Someone Somewhere.....the last from the duo of Jagjit & Chitra....after this Chitra just retired into seclusion....after the shocking death of their only son Vivek..in a tragic road accident.!!


Each & every gazal from this album is a gem....you will find a new sound...a new wave in every gazal!


Mere dukh ki koi dava na karo....
Mujhko mujhse abhi juda na karo..


Another gem of a gazal....a solo from Chitra...different sounds...interesting sounds...in every stenza.....I can feel the pain of a lover..who wants to be in a solitude!!


Pain can be sweet....if you are able to appreciate the talent of Jagjit & Chitra...!!!


Dekha to mera saya bhi....mujhse juda mila...
Socha to har kisi se....mera silsila mila...


Last from the album ....a solo by Jagjit...the masetro himself....typical deep voice..and small harkatein...which are trademark of Jagjit's gayaki...!! You want to listen it...again & again...that's the magic of Jagjit.


I often wonder...is this something...only I feel...or there are others as well...in this world...who do feel the sameway...?? God knows....who cares...!!!

Music & words

Expressions...?? what are they..?? Can feelings be expressed in words?? May or may not be..!! But then why there are few songs/poems ..which directly touch your soul & heart... definitely words can express feelings..to such an extent..that a dead heart can feel the beats again!!!


Then words woven with music....make it more expressive...more easily absorbable...more touching!
So when the magician of words and the maestro of gazal singing come together...it becomes a treat to listeners..gazal lovers...!!! Yes...Gulzar and Jagjit Singh..the duo need no introduction...marasim is an album by them...gift for people like us.
"Haath choote bhi to...rishte nahi chora karte...
waqt ki shaakh se..lamhe...nahi toda karte..."


That's the 1st gazal...of the album...beautiful words..rendered beautifully by jagjit singh in his velvet voice.
The pain in his voice..can be felt...I don't know from where he brings that! Such a deep and effective voice takes you in a superficial world...they call it 'shoonya' !! I think heaven is not any where else..but on this very earth...!!